10 Years of Love, Marriage, and Filming People Having Sex, Part I

Before our meeting last week, the producer asked me if I could e-mail her “the story of how you met, fell in love, and how the 2 of you got into this”. This is the sort of thing that any proper company would already have in it’s press kit, but we don’t. While we have some expertise in making movies, as promoters we’re still neophytes. It’s a story I’ve told a hundred times, but never took the time to write down.


I knew Peggy was the woman for me the first time we went to bed together. No, we didn’t have sex, but we kissed and petted, and there was just something about the way her hands felt on my body that was different, like she could feel what I was feeling, like it was meant to be. When we finally did have sex, this feeling was only confirmed. Being with her felt different than anyone I had ever been with before; not so much better (well better too), but closer, like we were made for each other. Within a few years we were married.

Our first experience watching porn together came after moving into our first apartment. I got take-out from the local Thai joint and a couple of videos from the corner rental shop: one feature and one of the emerging gonzo genre, hoping for a spicy night in. The take-out was spicy, but the videos were a disappointment. We watched for a bit, then got bored and turned them off before we lost all interest in having sex that evening.

Perhaps most people would have tried another video. I didn’t. I started thinking about why the videos didn’t do anything for us, and because I’m a filmmaker, I thought about it from a filmmakers point of view. I thought about how jarring the gross continuity errors and jump cuts were, I thought about how silly the arch art direction was, I marveled at how a delicious close-up of a big, enthusiastic cock going into an eager, juicy pussy got deadly boring when the camera just sat staring as the seconds turned into minutes. And I started to think that I could do it better, that I could make a film, with plenty of close-ups of cunts and cock and cum, that a couple like Peggy and I could watch together, from beginning to end, without touching the remote even once, and when we got to the end still feel pretty revved up about having sex with each other.

Now aside from my own over-inflated estimation of myself as a filmmaker, there were two technological inventions that I thought would help. One was the rapid development of desktop editing. Right about the time that Peggy and I first met I got my first AVID, and by the time we were being disappointed by our first porno I had upgraded my system to the point I could do broadcast quality work at home, on my own time. The other was the internet, which among other things allowed people to meet, and have frank online discussions, all with the protection of anonymity. I knew the way I wanted to make films was going to 1) take a lot of time to edit; 2) require finding open-minded couples who were married or in other long term relationships. The AVID and the internet would make this possible.

The other aspect was more subtle. I knew the shooting style I wanted to use would be somewhere between what you might do for sports and a sit-com. Those magic moments happen when they happen, and you have to get the coverage you need when they happen – no second takes or resetting for the reverse. That meant shooting two cameras, and the natural choice for the second camera was Peggy. She didn’t have any experience, but she was a designer and writer, so at least she had an aesthetic sensibility and we could talk the same language. And besides, no one had any experience shooting sex the way I wanted to, including me. Once I showed her which buttons to press, we were both starting from the same place!

In Part II, I’ll tell you how we began meeting couples and testing my theories on how to make better sex films!


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One Comment

  1. Posted December 26, 2006 at 6:37 pm | Permalink

    I’m glad you are telling this tale. Finally I’ll get a few of my questions answered.


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