Comments on: The Mystery of Sex, Spaced Cowgirl Style

By: Talking to your children about sex | The Art & Business of Making Erotic Films

Tue, 18 Nov 2008 15:34:44 +0000

[...] who sent us e-mail last night is right, and that the Googlebot is wrong. I know that Jenn P and Spaced Cowgirl are right, and the Googlebot is [...]

By: Goose

Goose — Mon, 17 Nov 2008 04:45:54 +0000

Lovely! I’ll do just that!

By: tony

tony — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 19:58:24 +0000

@ Goose I would say flip a coin between Xana & Dax and Matt & Khym. One couple together two years when we made their film, the other couple together 20; one couple with a flamboyant almost exhibitionistic love-making style, the other intensely focused on each other. If you don’t like what the coin tells you to do, do what you want to do

@SCG In choosing to make these films explicit, we’ve “crossed a line”, professionally, creatively, legally; and I sometimes wonder if it’s worth it. Saying over and over again, “No, this matters too!” gets exhausting.

This morning I woke up exhausted. But seeing that you “get it”, that there’s something in this films for you to “get” … my spirits are renewed!

By: spacedcowgirl

spacedcowgirl — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 19:34:47 +0000

Tony, thanks so much for your kind words and for this analysis. It gives me a lot to think about as I continue to contemplate the “mystery,” which is something I have only recently started doing in a conscious way.

There is this idea that when depicting sex, a filmmaker has to choose between being explicit and being cinematic, between erotic heat and emotional weight.

That really does seem to be the case! I think I understand better now why I don’t feel any real connection to so much of porn and/or depictions of sex in mainstream entertainment (though I do like and am fascinated with these things in many cases), and why nevertheless there is very occasionally that jolt of seeing a deeper meaning in these depictions. I think it’s when the actual sex isn’ t totally removed from sex, but at the same time the emotional importance of the connection isn’t glossed over either, that I feel that way.

By: Goose

Goose — Sun, 16 Nov 2008 19:25:09 +0000

We rarely watch erotic films, porn, etc for a variety of reasons, including the political. Also, a lot of standard porn seems boring to me. And they don’t look like me, the actresses, and they mostly don’t look like they ever laugh or have fun.

I’ve never purchased one of your films, but I’m going to come December. You guys may be familiar with our blog….what might you recommend for us first timers?